I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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