I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drake has all the answers
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize