I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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