tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize