Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
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