it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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