A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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