her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
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