she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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