I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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