i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
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