Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
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Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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