I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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