Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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