I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
It was confusing and full of hummus
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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