do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Randomize