I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize