Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
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