Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize