Kiss
Puke
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
It's rum buckets o'clock
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
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