Texts From Last Night

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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.

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  (508): i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker. http://tfl.nu/03y7
  Replies (5) Good night (570) Bad night (724) Order T-Shirt
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me

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  (317): His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me http://tfl.nu/9tmv
  Replies (9) Good night (580) Bad night (2270) Order T-Shirt
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.

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  (913): The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them. http://tfl.nu/9puy
  Replies (22) Good night (8116) Bad night (591) Order T-Shirt
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"

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  (603): she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer" http://tfl.nu/7wxh
  Replies (51) Good night (1085) Bad night (4028) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...

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  (443): dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this... http://tfl.nu/lbrb
  Replies (95) Good night (7460) Bad night (1175) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"

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  (630): Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind" http://tfl.nu/dke2
  Replies (17) Good night (4846) Bad night (904)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.

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  (330): She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay. http://tfl.nu/hfdj
  Replies (19) Good night (10427) Bad night (1082) Order T-Shirt
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.

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  (205): Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that. http://tfl.nu/r5hc
  Replies (33) Good night (3765) Bad night (1053) Order T-Shirt
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had

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  (902): you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had http://tfl.nu/lpp3
  Replies (9) Good night (3316) Bad night (624) Order T-Shirt
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?

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  (309): Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away? http://tfl.nu/ex4f
  Replies (19) Good night (4952) Bad night (772) Order T-Shirt
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...

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  (570): He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on... http://tfl.nu/xr5e
  Replies (12) Good night (2225) Bad night (941) Order T-Shirt
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid

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  (618): omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid http://tfl.nu/sbxo
  Replies (5) Good night (2265) Bad night (787) Order T-Shirt
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  (315): View more from New York

  Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check

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  (315): Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check http://tfl.nu/umxm
  Replies (7) Good night (779) Bad night (341) Order T-Shirt
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  (607): View more from New York

  I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?

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  (607): I drank butter last night, who am I to judge? http://tfl.nu/jfzo
  Replies (3) Good night (357) Bad night (733) Order T-Shirt
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.

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  (508): It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law. http://tfl.nu/9zdw
  Replies (8) Good night (1028) Bad night (377)

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