I hope mine doesn't look like that
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
being pregnant is like rehab
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
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