i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
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