Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
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Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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