Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
barbara walters just said penis...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Randomize