I wannas sexs uuuuu
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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