youre lurking in front of me
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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