i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
i just google imaged poop.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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