dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things ππ
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize