i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Randomize