I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
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I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
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