I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize