remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
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