Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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