Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize