she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
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If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
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woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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