I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
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