Say something about gay babies.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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