I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize