It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize