So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize