Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
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