She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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