nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize