Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize