oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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