that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
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traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
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On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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