Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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