I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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