i would punch a child for taco bell
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize